A new patient comes to see me today. He is improbably tall with slightly wild, rolling eyes. He is accompanied by a female "carer", who is literally half his size. There is a powerful atmosphere of "something-about-to-happen" in the room. He opens with:
"So, you're the doctor, right?"
"Yes, that's right. What can I do for you today?"
"Do for me, do for me? Why would you want to do anything for me? No, wait. I know what I want to do. I want to look at that map over there"
There is indeed a large map of the country on one wall of my consulting room. I go over to it as well, and we study it together in silence for a few moments. Then I ask him:
"Are you looking for anything in particular?"
"Yes, I'm trying to find where I live. Mm, ah, there it is!"
He points accurately to our city.
"Where do you live, doctor?"
I also point.
"Will you give me your phone number?"
His carer, who has kept her own counsel until this moment, suppresses a giggle.
"No way"
"Why not, doctor?"
"Well, I wouldn't want you ringing me up at 11 o'clock at night just when I was settling down for the night, now would I?"
Surprisingly, this seems to work. He goes back to his chair and we complete our transaction without further incident.
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